She had few illusions about the Soviet regime, but she did not like the sight of a crowd vandalising a statue of Lenin in Grozny either. "When people started fighting with statues, I knew it would end in tears." Nationalism of any sort repelled her. Half-Russian and half-Chechen as she was, she was caught in the middle. "I often felt this attitude in Chechnya: "Go back to your Russia" and in Russia, when I visited my mother, 'Get back to your Chechnya'."
Her attitude to independence, like that of most Chechens, changed in 1994 when the Kremlin decided to dislodge Mr Dudayev with tanks and bombs. "[These] actions had no justification and no sense…For me this was a personal tragedy. Now I felt the victim was my motherland."
For ordinary Chechens the first war was one of liberation, not separation. "Both the Chechens and the vast majority of the [ethnic] Russian population supported the rebel fighters." Among those fighters were Ramzan Kadyrov and Ms Estemirova's husband, who was later killed. When the war ended the next year, "it was a time of complete euphoria. Everyone was falling in love with each other." But joy was soon replaced by disappointment and desperation. Whatever money was earmarked for Chechnya by the Kremlin was stolen by Chechen and Russian officials before it got anywhere near the ordinary people.
illusion 환상. regime 政權(정권). vandalize 敵對視(적대시)하여 파괴하다.
statue 像(상). repel 혐오감을 주다, 격퇴하다, 반박하다. dislodge 쫓아내다.
justification 정당화, 옹호, 변호. victim 희생자. liberation 해방.
separation 분리. ethnic Russian 소수민족에 속하는 러시아인.
rebel fighter 叛軍戰士(반군전사). euphoria 행복감, 병적 쾌감. replace 대체하다.
disappointment 실망. desperation 절망, 自暴自棄(자포자기).
earmark 특정 목적을 위해 따로 제쳐놓다, 지정하다. official 관리.
B. 구문
- Half-Russian and half-Chechen as she was=Though she was Half-Russian and half-Chechen
cf. 무관사 명사/형용사+as+S+Be=Though+S+B+...
ex. Woman she was, she was very brave.=Though she was a woman, . . .
93-6-437
Ms Estemirova and her two-year-old daughter lived in a half-ruined flat in Grozny. "I was afraid of starvation, terribly afraid. I had everything rationed: the girl had to have one egg, one carrot, perhaps some porridge, so she wouldn't starve." She continued to teach while also helping to expose Russia's "filtration" camps, which were supposed to separate civilians from rebels but, in fact, tortured them.
In her eyes, however, Russia's brutality did not absolve the Chechens' own government of plunging the country into lawlessness. "Chechnya was neither a part of Russia, nor a separate state. It was a hole …A new type of crime flourished: kidnappings. The idea came from the federal forces who traded both in live and dead bodies. It was they who removed the taboo from these types of crimes."
In Grozny's market
She was in a bus when a Russian rocket exploded next to a maternity hospital. "I saw this huge cloud and I stood in a stupor." The second and third rockets hit a crowded market and a place near a mosque where people collected water. A man was lying next to her. "We tried to lift him and I couldn't understand why my arms were wet. It wasn't raining. I saw that my hands were covered in blood. He was a young man, nothing to do with rebels. I didn't know what to do, where to run…I got to my school and saw people laughing at me: I was swaying. Perhaps they thought I was drunk."
A. 어휘
half-ruined flat 반쯤 폐허가 된. starvation 餓死(아사). ration 배급하다.
porridge 죽. expose 폭로하다, 노출시키다. filtration 濾過(여과), 침투.
camp 수용소. civilian 민간인. rebel 반란군. torture 고문하다.
brutality 잔인성, 獸性(수성). absolve 죄를 면제하다.
plunge 쳐 넣다, 빠뜨리다, 突入(돌입)하다. flourish 번창하다. kidnapping 납치.
the federal forces 러시아 연방군. live and dead bodies 산 사람과 죽은 사람.
remove 제거하다. explode 폭발하다. maternity hospital 産院(산원).
stupor 무감각, 茫然自失(망연자실).
nothing to do with rebels 반군과는 전혀 관련이 없는. sway 흔들리다.
B. 구문
- I had everything rationed
[모든 물건을 배급받아야 했다.]
